Okay ladies, I’ll be the first to say that I absolutely DO NOT have my shit together 90% of the time. I’m a mess, my house is a mess, my kid is a mess (just always, lol), I’ve got clean wrinkled up laundry that’s been sitting in the basket for the past week, and dirty clothes on the floor. But you know what? I don’t need to have things perfect 100% of the time. When I do try to keep things in order and keep everything going as perfect as possible, I’m a stressed out bitch.
Being a stay at home mom is a hard job. I’m with my child 24/7. Living with my parents right now does help me out so so so much, but they both work full time. And its the same as when I’m living with my husband. He works wayyy more than full time, especially being in the Military, so I would usually just get an hour or two when he’s home to shower and pass out.
I mean, just to put it out there too, being ANY kind of mom is hard as hell! I worked for about 8 months before Kevin’s first transplant, and let me tell you, it was no easier! Having two parents working nearly fulltime, opposite shifts, is exhausting. You deal with baby all day, he gets home, you head out to work, he deals with baby all night, you get home and both of y’all are still waking up multiple times a night to deal with baby.
Now that I’m back to being a stay at home mom (it’s been about a year now), living apart and without help from my spouse (going on six months), I struggle most days to find peace or to just feel any kind of normalcy. It’s especially hard when my anxiety and depression come knocking at the door.
So, here are my tips and tricks to surviving as a stay at home mom (even if you’re an introverted anxiety ridden momma like me)!
Before I start- here’s my little disclaimer: even I don’t do this every single day. I’ll get stuck in my funks and just won’t take care of myself. I’m not perfect, but hopefully me putting this out there I can go back and read it, and remind myself what I need to do to get back to myself!
Join a Mom group
Joining a mom group has seriously given me life. It’s great to just talk to other Mom’s without the pressure of being out in public or face-to-face interaction. I have trouble meeting people or just talking to people in person, so this has given me a way to just drop a friendly comment and make some friends.
Or in my case.. typing? lol. This blog has been a huge way for me to get stuff off of my chest, even if no one reads or if my audience is small. There is something about just putting something out there and being able to see physically where your mind is at (if that makes any sense). I have a couple journals and notepads where I just write some stuff down that’s heavy on my mind.
Start a new TV show (or book)
Dive into something new! Everyone loves to binge watch shows on Netflix or get nose deep into a new book. It can be something in the background to help you get through that pile of laundry or just to give you a distraction.
A little retail therapy
Okay I know I’m not the first to admit that buying myself something new and shiny makes me feel better. Seriously, if you have the extra money, buy something for yourself! You can’t go wrong with that new eyeshadow palette or cute new pair of shoes. Treat. Yo. Self.
Blast that music
I recently bought a little blue tooth speaker and just get into my music some days! Its great for the kiddos too, they can dance along with you and get silly.
I’ll admit that this I have been absolutely terrible at getting enough of. But we all know how important sleep can be. Let the living room stay cluttered with toys, leave the dishes in the sink, forget about cleaning up your bathroom for the night and just go to bed!
One thing that I’ve mentioned before is struggling to find my purpose again. I’ve been so consumed with being a mom the past two years that I’ve lost a sense of who I am. Here’s what I did:
I found some new hobbies
Calligraphy and knitting. I know, not the most exciting things to do, but its been great for me. Both are fairly inexpensive to get into (calligraphy being the cheaper of the two), and knitting is most definitely the most time consuming.
I’m going back to school!
I have not publically announced this yet, but if all goes as planned (meaning, if this second transplant for Kevin goes well), I will be starting again this fall! I finished with my associates the month before I had Kevin, and I was fully prepared to go back to school that fall semester. But, we found out Kevin was sick and I’ve put it off since then. I know it may not be in everyone’s finances to go to school (or to go back to school), but check out financial aid and any grants or scholarships out there!
I joined network marketing
This is also not for everyone, but it has been so so great to me. I’m talking to at least a couple people everyday, I’m sharing products that I love, and I’m making money!
I know this counts as a hobby but whatever, I’m making it a new point, lol! I am not able to get out of the house most days, but lately I’ve been having my sister or my mom watch Kevin while I go and hike this mountain near my house (with my step dad). I’ve only gone a couple times, but I’m really hoping I can make it a habit! I’ve never been a super into nature type of person, but there is something about being outside exercising that really beats running on a treadmill in the gym (that you have to pay for).
But, that’s about it folks! If you have any suggestions or little things you do for yourself that you think would make a great addition to this, let me know!